The best part of my new and improved relationship with my husband is the communication upgrade we’ve acquired. We interact on a daily basis in a way I never dreamed possible. My minimum daily requirement for meaningful conversation (M.D.R.M.C.) has always been considerably high. Although, there were many things my honey and I had in common such as our children, extended domestic life, social and political values, the reflective stuff was reserved for like-minded females. Still, I enjoyed the best of both worlds: an adorable, loving, supportive husband and a bevy of accessible, sensitive, verbal women friends.
Which came first… the communication or the sex? I clearly remember the pivotal event, nearly a year and a half ago, that led to the communication and sexual renaissance of my marriage. My husband and I were on one of our rare dates: dinner at our favorite Japanese restaurant. I matter-of-factly asked if he was happy and he answered, “yes, but.” I was surprised to hear a “but.” To make a long story short, he expressed a desire to have more sex. Apparently, his hormones and vitality were stirring, and he felt that our sex life was in mathematical terms: Q.N.S. (quantity not sufficient). In truth, our sex life was measly at best; but I didn’t know anyone (and I mean anyone) who was having abundant, interesting sex.
We returned home at the end of our date, sought out a quiet place (our attic) where the ears of our offspring couldn’t access, and continued to talk. He was diplomatic; I was receptive. He was honest; I was in agreement. He was loving; so was I.
An affectionate kiss concluded our chat… which led to more… that led to much more. It seemed that the floodgates of something extraordinary opened up that night. It was the beginning of an inspired and creative love affair with communication that was to be as good as the sex.
So which came first in the metamorphosis of my marriage… the communication or the sex? My husband would say it was the sex. I’d beg to differ.
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